I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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