its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
God, I missed his penis.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
