IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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