well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I had to cum in my sink.
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