I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
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In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
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After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize