I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Randomize
