We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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