My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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