someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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