The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize