Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
