did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Drunk is not a location!
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
