Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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