I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
