is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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