Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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