Have you finally orgasmed yet?
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
And the cops told us we were all naked.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
