Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
home. puking in laundry basket.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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