Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
