Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
