Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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