my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
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3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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