I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
There r osticjed everywhere
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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