at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
the gays at disneyland are vicious
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Randomize
