but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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