you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
