wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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