my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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