She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
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the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
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and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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