Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
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