Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
