He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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