What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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