yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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