im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
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