Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
