I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize