the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
