so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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