is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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