if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
