guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
You were trust falling into bushes
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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