right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
He's a Shit stain on my heart
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Who died my cat blue again?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
