By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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