Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
it hurts more in the daytime
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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