I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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