I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
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