i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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