will power is for people who don't want to get laid
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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