"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
